Parenting my delightfully gay child through his elementary years has felt like steering a ship through uncharted waters. I have met plenty of parents of gay kids, but their kids came out in middle school or high school or as adults. We know a lot of gay teenagers, and my son has had some gay teenagers in his life as mentors, but he has not had peers.
This year, he started middle school, and finally, we feel like we are coming in to port, with some other ships on the horizon.
The middle school my son started at this year has a Gay Straight Alliance. The sixth graders eat lunch separately from the seventh and eighth graders, so unfortunately, the sixth grade club is not really established yet, but they have a lot of guidance from the sixth grade counsellor, whom my son is developing quite the bond with. The first day of the club, my son showed up, and there was only one other student there, Jack, a boy my son knows from band class.
“Well, at least now you know at least one other kid on campus who is also gay,” I pointed out, and my son, who is far more politically correct than I will ever be, reminds me, “Mom, I can’t make assumptions. He might just be an ally. Maybe he came because his parents are gay, or his older sibling is gay, or something like that.” I pointed out that even if that is true, it is nice to know a supportive friend on campus, regardless of the reason.
The next week was Halloween. Jack came to school dressed as a rainbow unicorn. “Do you think that means he is actually gay?” my son asked me. “I think it means he is gay and has a sense of humor too,” I replied. The next day, six people showed up to the GSA meeting. The six of them worked together to write an announcement for the morning announcements to encourage people to come to their club.
My son agreed to take notes and type them up to send to the teacher.
Being gay is just a tiny part of who my son is, but it is a part that made him feel completely different from everyone he knew for several years. I think now we see the light at the end of the tunnel.
