Why is it so difficult to imagine a world the opposite of what we know? Why is it so easy to not think of what an LGBT person in the room is thinking or feeling in reaction to our comments? I myself am far too guilty of just failing to really understand, and I am horribly self-conscious about it.
The GLSEN group recommends in their "Safe Schools Guide" that when someone comes out to you, one of the things you should say is, "Have I ever done or said anything to offend you or make you feel uncomfortable?"
Because we just don't realize how insensitive we can be, or what it would be like to be on the other side of the coin.
I'm glad the world is changing. My son's youth group leader at church is a proud gay man who is one of my son's greatest role models. Last weekend, he brought his new boyfriend to a church event, and as he joined the table to our kids and our friends and we all sat around laughing together and just talking about life, I got to know him a little bit, and he is just an awesome person. I'd love to spend more time with them, because this new boyfriend of his really has my sense of humor. I didn't think about it at the time, but I thought about it like a week later: my kid has totally normal gay couples as part of his every day life. He has gay role models. He has favorite television shows that have positive portrayals of LGBT people. Like really, the kid's gonna be alright.
I hope. But I won't ever know what it's like to walk in his shoes. And admitting that is hard for me. Everyone who aims to be any ally at all really needs to watch this video and remember: we, as allies, are just allies. We have hetero privilege, and some of us have white privilege. And privilege is real.
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