The Perfect Book

     When my son first "came out," (a term I hate using, but do for lack of a better term) his declaration was not about someone he liked or sexual feelings (no way, for heaven's sake, he was SEVEN). He expressed concern that he would not be able to have kids, because deep down inside, he knew he wanted to spend his life with another male, and he was old enough to know that men don't get pregnant, and that's about all he knew of where babies come from -- they come from ladies' bellies.

    Faced with difficult circumstances, people in my family, we don't talk about these things (at first). We don't look for movies about these things. We search for the perfect book. Because books have all the answers.  No, Google does not have all the answers, but Amazon... on Amazon, I can buy the perfect book. The perfect book will have all the answers. Then we can talk. About the book. And other stuff.

     When I asked my mom about sex when I was nine years old, my mom's answer was, "I saw something on the Today show... a book. I'll order it for you." And so it was that I learned the vast majority of what I know about sex from Dr. Ruth Westheimer.

    Thus, I was certain that the perfect book existed for this situation. I'd heard about these books. Sadly, I had heard about them because they occasionally make a media appearance when some crazy parents think that banning them from school libraries or public libraries is the key to making sure their kids don't end up gay. (News flash - Books don't make kids gay.  Biology does. But books do help those who are to not feel so alone in this great big hetero world).

     After lots of online research and reviews, I decided on And Tango Makes Three. It's about two male penguins in the Central Park Zoo who keep trying to raise a rock, but it never hatches, and so eventually, the zookeepers save an abandoned egg and give it to these male penguins. My son's first favorite movie was Madagascar, so I thought that the familiarity of the Central Park Zoo, and the fact that it was a true story, might really connect with my son.

     Gosh, was I right. When it arrived, we cuddled up together, and I read the book to him.  He was beaming from ear to ear. "Is this a real story?" he asked.

     "Yes, it sure is," I answered.

      Later that night, he wanted Daddy to read it to him at bedtime too. So he did.  And they bonded. And that made him happy.

     And the next day, he asked if he could bring the book to school to read during silent reading time.

    My heart kind of skipped a beat.  I wasn't sure what to say. Would the other kids ask about it? Would it start unnecessary drama? Would the teacher suddenly know we are those liberal parents that let their kids read this kind of stuff and suddenly treat our son differently?  (We live in a very conservative town, albeit in an otherwise liberal state).

     I tried to deter him with, "That one? But you've read it twice."  Sigh. That line didn't work with Belle in Beauty and the Beast, and it clearly wasn't going to work here either. I gave in and hoped for the best.

     That night, I got an email from my son's teacher.

     He'd asked to take a reading quiz on the book in their schools computerized reading system. He got 100%. It was the first time he had ever got a 100% on a book quiz before. The teacher could said she could tell that he really liked that book, and he was really proud of himself for that A+.

     As the rest of the year went on, this teacher proved to truly be a gift from God. He could not have had a more perfect teacher during this interesting time for our family.